


Boredom Fix

by ancallis



Category: Naruto
Genre: Gen, No Romance, Slight Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-18
Updated: 2018-12-18
Packaged: 2019-09-21 15:18:23
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 896
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17046089
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ancallis/pseuds/ancallis
Summary: What better way to spice up your afternoon than to spend it with a crazed cult member?





	Boredom Fix

In the midst of running away from enemy ninja, Ino spies a cult member from the corner of her eye. She’d have normally minded her own business- disbanding a cult was not in her mission description- but, to be blunt, she’s extremely bored with her life. It’s a never ending cycle of train, then a mission, then rest. Sure, she has some things to cut the edge off her boredom, like breaking the hearts of approximately 24 boys and counting, though, it’s simply not enough to cure her of it. She makes a U-turn, and runs back towards the direction of the cult member, clad in red pants and white bandages wrapped around his waist, a bloody multi-bladed scythe in his hand. Perhaps this will be her temporary fix. She darts into his ritual site, hiding far up in a tree. She spies one heavily mutilated dead body hidden on the forest floor. 

“Hey, what the fuck are you-!” He stops yelling at her when she puts her finger up to her lips, as if saying ‘sh’, and then points in the direction she came from. He almost breaks his neck when he rips his head around, trying to see what or who’s coming. Four ninja run up to him. 

“Have you seen a blonde woman come by here?” They ask, panting. 

He looks up to the girl hiding, who makes a cutting motion along her neck, and then grins. “Nope, but I think I may know who you have business with.”

He dashes forward, and decapitates two of them with his scythe, feeling himself shudder with joy when the heads bounce onto the ground. Then, he tastes the blood of the remaining two, letting the metallic taste of blood marinate in his mouth. Using the rest of the blood from them, he draws a circle with a triangle inside. Goosebumps from pleasure rise up all along his body as Jashin’s divine power flows within him. Puny kunai hit him, the pain bringing him closer and closer to his climax. He pulls out a long needle from his pants, tracing it over his chest like a tongue on a lover’s body. 

“Please, let me show you true pleasure!” He yells, shaking in anticipation of what’s to come. He stabs the needle into his heart, eyes rolling back in ecstasy as the two ninja scream in the pain of dying. He falls to his knees in rapture, moaning loudly. He remains on the ground, lying in the bliss after an orgasm. She falls from the tree, landing next to him. 

“Well, that was kind of weird.” She says uncomfortably, trying her best not to look the wet spot on his pants.

He gazes up at her, fervent reverence in his glassed over crimson eyes. “My goddess.” He whispers, kneeling in front of her. He can tell that Jashin has sent her to him with blood splattered all over her and the sacrifices she brought him. She’s beautiful. 

She frowns, ignoring what he just said, and squats down next to him. “I’m Ino, what about you?”

“Hidan.” 

“Well, it was nice meeting you Hidan, but I unfortunately have to go. Bye!” She stands up and turns to go, but he grasps her hand. Her heart beats faster, every nerve in her body telling her that this man is dangerous, and she should leave now.

“You brought me them. Jashin-sama sent you to me.” He runs his free hand through disheveled grey hair, laughing. “Fuck, I must’ve done something good for him to reward me like this.” 

His grip on her wrist grows tighter, hurting her. “Jeez, let go! I’ll stay a bit longer if that’s what you want.” She pleads. He releases her, and she massages the area. Looks like she’ll bruises there tomorrow. “So, what do you want?”

“I don’t even know what to fucking say! Shit, today is just such a good day!” He exclaims. She realizes he’s no longer talking to her, but some invisible audience. If she had known that things would progress to this point, she wouldn’t have stopped. 

“Look, if you’re not going to do anything, I’m going to leave. I got things to do for, you know, Jashin.” She says.

He holds up his hand. “Wait, wait, wait. Did Jashin-sama say anything about me to you when he sent you?” 

“Um, yes. He said you are a very loyal follower, and that you should keep doing what you’re doing.” She turns to leave but he grabs her hand once more. She looks at him, her heart racing because maybe he knows she’s lying, but instead finds that he kisses her hand softly. Rather than feeling warm, she feels disgusted at the man who came when he killed four people. 

“May Jashin-sama send you my way again soon.” He murmurs, humid breath against her fingers. She yanks her arm away, trying not to grimace. 

“Yeah, bye.” She says, turning to leave for the last time. When she feels she’s out of sight, she frantically wipes her hand on her clothes, rubbing off the memory of his lips on her skin. A lone thought burns itself in her mind; who the fuck is Jashin?

_______________________

Choji hands her a beer at the bar, their usual post-mission meet up spot. “How was the mission?” 

She shudders, taking a drink. “You wouldn’t even believe it.”

**Author's Note:**

> Hidan's quite the interesting character. I hope I correctly portrayed his religious fanaticism. Maybe I'll write a bit more of him in the future.


End file.
